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Do You Have a Strategy for Managing Your Emotions?

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“I have got to get that flushed out of my mind.”

With admiration, I listened to my husband’s earthy self-awareness. He emerged from a lengthy, frustrating, discordant meeting—a total waste of his valuable time—and declared his determination to let it go. Even though the discussion robbed him of a much-needed slice of his morning, he knew better than to let the experience burn up the rest of his day.

In other words, he knew how to proceed.

I thought to myself, “I like his self-awareness in the face of this emotional challenge. Would I respond with the same measure of maturity?”

Ironically, I simultaneously faced a challenge of my own. A routine phone conversation began with positive, emotional encouragement from the person on the other end of the line. Yet her unsuspecting, adverse comments soon blind-sided me, and my emotions plummeted. I hung up and wondered, “How did that just happen?”

The baggage in my brain created an uncomfortable disturbance.

I desperately needed to move forward and maximize my day, but the negative emotions inside of me clung like barnacles. My husband's approach was appealing, but how could I get there? Obviously, this matter required further contemplation. 

Emotional maturity is far more complex than simply inserting an emoji into a typed text. Managing our feelings is a desirable goal to pursue, but not always easy to achieve.

Here are my suggestions:

  • Acknowledge emotions. Bring them to the light; stuffing emotions is dangerous and unhealthy.

  • Enjoy emotions. When they are high, enjoy the ride.

  • Don’t trust emotions. They can be fickle and are subject to change.

  • Pray through emotions. All along the spectrum, emotions need to be taken to God.

This last suggestion is gold. The Holy Spirit has taught me to pray honestly, using my own customized prayer strategy. After all, God created me as an emotional being, and He knows best how to manage this aspect of my person with the goal being godly maturity. Here is how I speak honestly with my heavenly Father, particularly when my emotions tend toward the color gray:

Prayer 1: Lord, you are The God of Peace. Jesus died to give me peace. Peace is my rightful inheritance as your daughter. Peace is a fruit of your Spirit. Please bring peace to my emotions, which are not at this moment peaceful.

Prayer 2: Lord, please sanctify my emotions. Sift the way I feel through the truth of Your Word.

Prayer 3: Lord, I implore You to be Lord of my emotions. I want you to be Lord of every aspect of my life, and right now I am most aware of needing you to live as Lord of my emotions. I place them into Your Hands.

Prayer 4: Lord, do what I cannot do; take this disturbing situation resulting in negative thoughts and emotions and transform it for Your glory and my good. I do not want to be weighed down and distracted with brain clutter.

Granted, every unsettling situation requires its own targeted prayer, but I have found the Lord faithful to meet me, right where I am, with His supernatural supply of grace. He welcomes me to bring my emotions to Him. The reassurance that my life is in His Hands, and not in my hands or the hands my own emotions leads me toward the emotional equilibrium needed to move forward. 

In Him we live and move and have our being (Acts 17:28a).

 

Living With Eternal Intentionality®  

When has the Lord intervened in your emotions and led you to His higher ground?

Will You Go to the Ocean with Me?

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The ocean is a miraculous place. Sun, sand, beach umbrellas, flip-flops, and salty breezes coalesce to create an album of memories like none other. Right?

The ocean may or may not be a part of your summer plan. But I want to treat you to a visit to the seaside through the words of my granddaughter, Vera.

On a recent stay, I entered her cheerful room to tuck this energetic little lady in for the night. However, our bedtime routine paused, and another conversation blossomed. With sparkling eyes, Vera opened the top drawer of her turquoise dresser, and enthusiastically said, “Oh, Gammy, these are some of the books I have written! Choose which ones you want to read. Here…this one is my book of poems.”

Sensing her joy, I offered my hands and accepted the proud accomplishments of this second-grader. Then, I kissed her goodnight, smiled, and slipped from her room.

Downstairs I discovered that the simple yellow cover belied the collection of treasures. On one page after another, captivating word pictures poured forth. I journeyed through the creative poetic expressions of my granddaughter, and savored a rich literary feast from one wise beyond her years.

With her permission, a sample is offered here for your enjoyment. I invite you to read without haste, and to read several times. Perhaps you will even smell the salty air.

The Ocean

The wind starts to blow.

Then the water wakes up.

The waves play tag while shells get tossed up and down.

The ocean is awake.             

-Vera, 8 years old

 

Living With Eternal Intentionality

When is the last time you felt an ocean breeze blowing in your face?

What thoughts does the memory provoke?

How does the vastness of the ocean expand your concept of God?

The sea is His; He made it (Psalm 95:5).

 

Do You Ever Think About Dying?

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Do You Ever Think About Dying? Do you ever think about the end of your life?

An argument (almost) inevitably erupts between Larry and me when the subject of death surfaces. On this topic he and I predictably disagree, and feelings escalate. Relentlessly, we quarrel over who gets to die first.

Winnie the Pooh’s poem softens the sentiments for us:

"If you live to be a hundred, I want to live to be a hundred minus one. I never want to live a day without you.”

Neither my beloved nor I can fathom life without the other, but face it, the decision is not ours to make. My days (and his) are numbered; I have no idea when my end will come. (Psalm 139:16)

However…

Between now and then, I want each day to count. I want to wring every drop of purpose and meaning out of my temporal existence. But we ask, "How is that humanly possible?" I invite you to join me to revisit and further develop the thoughts from a previous blog: What Is Your Epithet?  

In our performance-oriented, pressure-driven world, you and I are left to doubt and question the validity of our efforts. How do we know that we are doing the right thing with our days? The Words of Jesus (Mark 14:8) meet us with invigorating encouragement: She did what she could.

Three guidelines pave the way for you and me to march today confidently toward our inevitable last day.

Guideline #1: Make Jesus our focus.

Determine that pleasing and serving Him is central for the whole of life. Imagine the lens of a sophisticated camera. As the photographer turns the black cylinder, the fuzziness disappears, and the correct image emerges as paramount. So it is when we fix our gaze is fixed on Him.  

Guideline #2: Live above the opinions of others.

Unfortunately, noise reduction headsets are not available for the harsh rebukes and judgmental opinions of others. Determine to rise above the racket, and do what He wants you to do. When you allow the Voice of Grace to silence the voices of criticism, this is what you will hear:

She did what she could. Acceptance from Jesus

She did what she could. Approval from Jesus

She did what she could. Affirmation from Jesus

Guideline #3 Give Him our best and give it now.

Don’t bargain on this point; don’t negotiate; don’t be stingy. For goodness sake, don’t withhold the best for later. Go ahead—give Him Your best. Now. Give Him the best of your day, the best of your calendar, the best of your possessions, the best place in your relationships. Pleasing the Savior is the supreme priority for any woman; worshipping Him is the ultimate pursuit transcending century and culture.

Perhaps you, too, want your living epithet to read: She did what she could.

 

Living With Eternal Intentionality

In today’s frantic frenzy, how are you challenged to make Jesus your focus?

When do the opinions of others dictate decisions on how you invest your life?

What is different when Jesus gets the best of your time and calendar?