Top Ten Mental Mistakes

Stretched out on the couch, watching our favorite football team, felt dead right. Buried in the vocabulary of first downs and interceptions, wide receiver and linebacker, flea flicker and audible, delayed blitz and play action, I had no intention of writing a blog post.

But I couldn’t help myself.

While the SEC football drama played out on the screen, the dominant topic played out in my head: mental mistakes. As I listened, the sportscaster persistently pointed out one team’s mental mistakes. And, sure enough, when the whistle blew, mental mistakes robbed said team of victory. (Groan.)

However, mental mistakes are not confined to the gridiron, are they? And you and I need not be university athletes to still suffer the penalty from costly mental errors. Consider the following list of thought patterns that take us places God never intended us to go.

Top Ten Mental Mistakes in the Life of a Child of God

Mental Mistake #1: Worry

Mental Mistake #2: Fear

Mental Mistake #3: Viewing the future without factoring in the Presence of God

Mental Mistake #4: Naïve attitude regarding our spiritual battle

Mental Mistake #5: Obsessive thinking, Overthinking, and Negative thinking

Mental Mistake # 6: Introspection

Mental Mistake #7: Not believing the best of another

Mental Mistake #8: Permitting a problem to become an idol

Mental Mistake #9: Self-flagellation

Mental Mistake #10: Neglecting to consult the Lord when making a decision

Ok, one more …

Mental Mistake #11: Judging the actions of someone without obtaining the facts

Living With Eternal Intentionality®

Mental Mistakes are costly, and rob us of God’s intended walk of victory. What mental mistake can you add to the list I created?

For further reflection, ask yourself the following:

What is the most common mental mistake I am prone to make?

What would be God’s plan from His Word to correct this thinking pattern?

But we have the mind of Christ … (1 Corinthians 2:16b).

A Romance Backstory Finally Told

Devotedly, The Personal Letters and Love Story of Jim and Elisabeth Elliot brings to life the previously untold story of romance between Elisabeth Howard and Jim Elliot.

Years ago, Elisabeth Elliot bequeathed to her daughter Valerie a special collection of letters written to her (Elisabeth Howard) from Jim Elliot between 1948 and 1953. But with eight children and a household of activity, this pastor’s wife stored them in her attic. Then one day, when the whirlwind of life slowed, the treasure trove with its contents emerged. Soon, this extraordinary book, Devotedly, The Personal Letters and Love Story of Jim and Elisabeth Elliot by Valerie Elliot Shepard came into being.

Drawing from journals, diaries, and these letters, the only daughter of this legendary missionary couple tells the backstory of their romance:

~They only saw each other five times in five years.

~Their individual relationships with God, and His supreme call on their lives, consistently took precedence over their relationship with each other.

~His divine purpose ruled their wills, and a future together was not a foregone conclusion.

~At a tender moment in their relationship, Elisabeth was diagnosed with tuberculosis.

What other discoveries await the reader inside these covers? For starters, just imagine, he called her Betts; she called him Jim, my darling. But these terms of endearment waited years for expression.

Upon reading the pages, I collected a plethora of quotes in hopes of providing you with insight into the magnificence of this relationship, and how it developed. (Elizabeth Howard, EH; Jim Elliot, JE) Believe me, this brief collection serves only as a preview!

[Note: These quotes are taken directly from the new book, Devotedly, The Personal Letters and Love Story of Jim and Elisabeth Elliot, B&H Publishing Group]

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Wept myself to sleep last night after seeing Betty off at the depot. JE

I’d rather walk with God in the darkness than go alone in the light. EH

I stand now in darkness-the only glimmer of vision into the future is the faint apprehension of a road I do not care to tread. EH

Lord, rule my will and affections. EH

All that I ought to be, Christ is. And Christ liveth in me. Enough? It is enough. EH

It’s a matter of the WILL; you make a CHOICE not to worry or fret. EH

Grace for tomorrow is never given today. Neither is grace given for imaginations. EH

I love him with all my being. EH

To marry you would be an admission to myself that Christ is not sufficient. JE

This morning I feel that nameless depression which comes to me when alone and in new circumstances. EH

Worship is excellent exercise for the soul. Makes a man big inside, makes him feel like he has found what he was built for — though he is conscious that he is inept. JE

September 20 I really knew that I loved her. JE

Jim said, “Do you realize what it may cost?” (speaking of the possibility of his going into work among the Aucas). Yes, I realize what it may cost—death. And it is not as though I have not considered this possibility before. EH

Funny, but I never think of my having the accident and your losing me … JE

Jim, my darling, I pour out my heart in thanksgiving to the Lord for you, every time I go to pray…. EH

Forget not in age what tenderness you knew there, my soul. JE

Because more than anything else I know, Betts dearest, what I want to do is make you happy. JE

I love you madly, and think there just isn’t anyone else to compare. EH

How I praise God for him - no one could ask for more of like than to be loved as I am loved. EH

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Now, with these few excerpts served as an appetizer, treat yourself to a feast of reading from Devotedly, The Personal Letters and Love Story of Jim and Elisabeth Elliot.

But first, get a cup of coffee, sit down, and listen to this one-of-a-kind interview with author and daughter, Valerie Elliot Shepard. Here, with deep emotion, she pours out her heartfelt motivation for writing the book. Every letter has so many profound truths in them that they are precious. They are treasures, unbelievable treasures … My father and mother’s love was huge, deep, because they were so committed to loving God first … I hope to carry on the legacy simply by telling the story.

Living With Eternal Intentionality®

While readers of Elisabeth Elliot will recognize some of her familiar teachings, is there something new here that arrests your attention?

Where is there encouragement for today’s couples seeking God’s will in their relationship?

Marriage Counseling 101

My head fell forward into my hands. Thoroughly disheartened, I sat on the sofa and fought back tears. The warm summer night did nothing for my cold, crushed feelings. Granted, to someone else, this would not even be a bleep on his or her emotional radar. But for me, this was a big deal.

Let me explain.

Larry threw my clothes into the dryer. Had this been towels and sheets, I would have welcomed his kindness. But these were not towels and sheets. These were my two useable summer Polo shirts, red and blue. When I pulled the load from the machine in the basement, I discovered—with horror—that my tops were reduced to the size for a toddler, and rendered useless for an adult.

Attempting good marital communication, I returned upstairs and engaged Larry in conversation. Seeing the evidence in my outstretched hands, he expressed remorse. (Great.) While I appreciated his apology, I could not imagine manufacturing the funds to replace my clothing.

So, now on the couch, I sat immobilized in a self-created cocoon. I felt sick; and I felt stuck. This was not good.

In quiet seclusion—feeling the onset of a marvelous pity party—I prayed. “Lord, I don’t want this to grip me and ruin the plans for our summer evening. Truly, I want to respond correctly. But this hurts. How do I handle it? How do I manage to get on with life?”

In that moment …

On that couch …

Heaven and earth stood still as a Whisper from the Holy Spirit spoke to my heart: Walk in newness of life.

Clear …

Undeniably clear …

And just as clear, was the reality that I had to make a choice – obey or disobey. Thank goodness, the same Holy Spirit who gave me the instructions also gave me the supernatural power to move forward to walk in newness of life.

For my laundry situation, walk in newness of life meant:

• Engage and release: engage with Larry in prayer, and forgive him for making a simple human error

• Enjoy our dinner

• Embrace our summer evening’s recreational plan

Thankfully, walk in newness of life brought peace, joy, laughter, and freedom. And interestingly enough, in the upcoming weeks, the same admonition quietly, gently repeatedly presented itself in a myriad of situations transcending the boundaries of the laundry crisis. Each time, the way forward was clear: walk in newness of life. And each time, I faced a choice: walk in newness of life or stay stuck in the muck.

Two shirts, five words—in the Hand of the Holy Spirit—provide curriculum content for Marriage Counseling 101. The clothing loss pales in comparison to the value of the lesson.

Walk in newness of life: Five. Small. Words.

Living With Eternal Intentionality®

We therefore were buried with Him through baptism into death, so that, just as Christ was raised up out of the dead by the glory of the Father, so we also should walk in newness of life (Romans 6:4). BSB

How do you identify with the words walk in newness of life?

What other option do you and I have when faced with the choice to walk in newness of life?

What are the characteristics that result when we do not walk in newness of life?

Prayer:

Father, will You please give me a sensitive heart to hear You when you offer me the opportunity to walk in newness of life? I want to experience more and more the reality of this path that You so graciously provide for me. And to You be all the glory!